God help me, I did it...
I finally made Aggie hit Stella. And not just hit her. Burrow her fingers into the soft flesh in her upper arm and pinch. A hidden cruelty, shielded by the mother's unwashed body, which is pressing Stella so tightly into a corner the girl is afraid she might faint. Pain, pressure, body odor--I threw it all at the poor, helpless child.
I didn't cry when I did it, but I wanted to.
I did it right there in the middle of the second chapter, after the morticians take George's body away. I did it so no reader can say they didn't know things would only get worse.
You guys told me I had to do it, and I knew you were right. Describing the already yellowing bruise or the memory of the sting of the slap wasn't enough to be honest about the stakes. Now what happens to Stella and what she does can all make crazy sense.
Since you told me I had to do it I'd been stalled. And now that I've done it other parts are falling into place too. I hope it's worth the damage. I don't mean to me, because I can take it. But oh, my poor Stella. ~ Victoria Tirrel
I didn't cry when I did it, but I wanted to.
I did it right there in the middle of the second chapter, after the morticians take George's body away. I did it so no reader can say they didn't know things would only get worse.
You guys told me I had to do it, and I knew you were right. Describing the already yellowing bruise or the memory of the sting of the slap wasn't enough to be honest about the stakes. Now what happens to Stella and what she does can all make crazy sense.
Since you told me I had to do it I'd been stalled. And now that I've done it other parts are falling into place too. I hope it's worth the damage. I don't mean to me, because I can take it. But oh, my poor Stella. ~ Victoria Tirrel
posted by Seven Authors in A Private Conversation at 4:25 PM
3 Comments:
Transference. Aggie's pain had to have an outlet and Stella was destined to be that outlet. Even if Aggie had channeled her rage towards creating great paintings or toiling at three jobs, that rage would remain unsated as long as the children are there to remind her of George. I am sorry for Stella, too.
By engaging our sense of smell you have taken us there, into Stella's small, tight space of pain and terror--AND WE HAVEN'T EVEN READ THE PASSAGE YET!
What a good reminder for all writers--a blank page has such possibilities. We now know that Aggie's body odor will always unconsciously trigger a flight/fight response in Stella.
Bravo for revealing such an honest scene.
ang
well, Vickie, you and I both pushed through writing walls this week. You wrote and I deleted. And we knew to do it because of feedback from our group. Hooray for our group! Writers need writers!
REva
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